treasure money, love etc..

woah. people sems to be spending more than they should huh...
just just now, dad bought a pair of new sandals n bro got a brand new pair of shinguards both from royal sporting house. eargh. jealous sia.

sales everywhere.
hello!Singtel had a whole lot of ppl queing up for their stuffs. offers here n there.
royal sporting house has a "Junior Soccer Day". Like real. dun just simply name it a Day when in actual fact u're just trying to get rid of ur products.
World Cup is round the corner. Nike's the sponsor. Nike wear is on discount. They know that these items won't be popular once the new Nike World Cup items are out so they're going all the way down to 40% discount. Haha. I'm not that stupid u noe. anyway, i'm not a Nike fan. i'm an ADIDAS girl. ahacKz.. **thats a hint for u guys in case u're getting me a present this july** LOL

religious classes really made me aware that there are kids who are worst off than me. i mean, i'm not boasting that i am good.
there are adik2 in madrasah who lacks the 4 letter word at home. L-O-V-E.
its not that i ask for it but its jus that enviness boils in me seeing my other sibs get it. well no point asking or even saying it now cos i'm all grown up n i dun think i need it either.
kesian adik2 ni. n i mean real adik2. 14 years old bah... dont know what got to them. ustazah ceritakan. didn't really get he story cos i entered class halfway thru while she was sharing. stupid jam la..niwaes, its all bout sex. they're dying to experience it. i was like what the crap??! ustazah told us that she couldn't sleep for days thinking bout these two cases. a boy n a girl. both 14.its separate cases but the concept is the same. ustazah's in a dilemma whether to tell their parents or not n us being the "senior" said she should. pity them la
we all agree that it all boils down to the upbringing. so glad that i wasnt one of them.
the girl has a sis who lost her virginity. she thinks its alright for her to do so since her big sis does it. the boy lacks that 4 letter word n he's left to wonder bout the world n started looking at girls.*u guys sure know what u look at right??* n ustazah said that was exactly what that boy did.he's good in drawing. especially those kind of japanese animated catoons. n he drew pretty sexy girls in class. gawd!!
he has a father who sends him to class every day but yet something is lacking. both their parents are working. the boy's dad is a police officer. i tell u, the way ustazah describes it makes it sounds as if he's a rapist. really! imagine. a police officer's son commiting a crime.geez..i will never ever do anything that will harm my dad's reputation. i wouldn't dare.
he worked so hard to get that rank. went through all sorts of experience. sit for night classes after a hard day's work for 3 years to qualify for the next higher rank n i have to tarnish it all by one stupid act going against the law?? darn. hell no.



okok. stop here for tonight. study study.
mom's not home but dad's getting onto my nerve. hate it la! can't i have my own privacy for just half an hour to update this blog??! eargh. irritating

nonsense.

nothing much i did today.

went out early morning to get some stationaries over at Popular cwp. gosh.it was so damn pack. what's with everybody?? maybe just got progress package so want to splurge la. haha.
read the news. wow. Sir Salim is almost on every page. haha. the youngest candidate so far for the elections. congrats2.

today just sat home n did some revision, improvised my folio. more to sch stuffs la. when i checked my blog just now, i was so annoyed! who tag at my tagboard n started spouting nonsense. u read la...what crap man. who de hell is "aren't u losers?" i was so god damn frustrated when i read that. did that fella got the right person. hey u "aren't u losers?", if u're brave enough, come forward n confront me! no point hiding ur identity, u freak!

till i get to that fool, see ya guys ard.
buaiZz...

woah.

i didn'tknow starting sch at 9 was so great. i've never felt that alert for lessons before. n there was no hurry for me to rush to sch. felt so relaxed. perhaps i should propose that to the sch. LOL.

didn't know yesterday's event was still fresh in everyone's mind. kimi,diq n dian were saying that i play cheat during yesterday's parade. they said i implanted a mic in my throat. mentang2 aku ni perempuan, tkleh shout command ah ni kirakan..haha. but funny la. they die2 say i put. well, all i gotta say is, only god knows how i did it n only my GOH contingent knows that i DIDN'T cheat. LOL. received heaps of praises from teachers, esp mr ong. comparing us to his "military" style. he said it was just the same standard. well, thanks.=D

early morning, 1st lesson was el but teacher was on course n we were left to do our own stuffs. while doing our "stuffs", along came in the new OM, Mr Khair n there he was sharing with us his stories. Old man mah...like grandad like dat. telling life stories to his grandchildren. his an interesting fella i should say. he came from the changi prison. a retired warden officer as well as a caner. the moment he said caner, the 1st thing that came to my mind was: "O well. all the best to those students who will be caned in te future". HAHA. 24 years of experienced caning should have done him good. nice stories he had. been sued n brought to court for caning a guy 48 times n caused him to be impotent. really really nice stories he had. too bad he couldn't stay long cos almost half of the class had to go for medical checkup. he said he would come by again some day n share more.

soo soo soo happy no NPCC training today. its like the 1st friday i get to go back at 12.30 n sleep for hours. LOL. really missed my afternoon naps.

bro is down with a fever. i guess that means i can't bully n play with him. man! haha. *evil sis* prays hard its not hfmd cos 4 of his play friends didnt come to sch today too cos they're down with fever too.

found out that WDL ex HCI, Salim Sir, is standing in election under WP. didn't know he was that capable. looks like he's one lucky guy huh..salute u Sir. haha. niwaes, to me i dun think WP is that popular among us. Lets see what they're up to. well, all the best Sir for ur elections.

overall, an interesting day for me. lots of things happened. great. haha.
nitess..

its OVER.

yes arh!! i'm so glad its OVER. finally OVER. so glad that i dun have to face that nervous feeling ever again. haha. well, except for my O's now. hah! i'm so so so soooo happy. no words can explain it man...really. i'm so glad. i'm so relieved. i just feel like jumping for joy. HAHAHA.
aniwaes, i received a token from the navy officer. so touched. he personally came forward to me and shook my hand with a navy badge in his palm. ahh...thanks alot sir. =D oh no! i forgot to take pics wth him n say thanks. darn! that was once in a lifetime experience to be trained from proffesionals. gosh. how dumb can i be. if only i could ever see him again, i will of course express my thanks n gratitude to him. argh, thats human beings u see. u tend to take things for granted. Cyril Alvar Sir, ur help n guidance has surely been alot of help to the GOH contingent. Thanks alot sir.
lastly, after everything was over, there will always be us snapping photos together. LOL. niwaes, tmr no trainin. yay!! another joy. haha. CCA will stand down today for the Mid Years but not yet for the passing-out-parade. which means, i will have to go for trainings after Mid Year. wad de hell! argh! lets just see what happens k. i'm still angry that they pstpone the POP.
till then, niteZz..
*sch starts @ 9 tmr. yay can wake up late. another joy. LOL* =P

fast one

turning in soon. gonna make it fast. lets just talk bout tmr's plan. wheelie wheel, its gonna be fun!

finally, the day we've been waiting for has finally arrived. My FINAL speech day in my life. soon after i graduate,i vow not to relate myself to NPCC matters anymore. i guess 4 years has done me enough. HAHA. i really wanna do my best tmr. i want them do look good and do their part well too. this is it. we'll do it once and for all n its done. OVER. we can only do it once. no replay. no 2nd chance. its that critical. 1st impression lasts. we gotta do it 1stly for ourselves n 2ndly for the unit n for the school. C'mon guys!~ let's get it done n over with!! we'll pull through together.

by right, fri we should step down but something occurred today n our POP will be postponed. wtf man?!!! this is all crap. i've been looking forward to this day n this is what they did??! argh. darn pissed off. make it fast la. i can't go on like this any longer. Earggh!... some miscommunication happened la.

niwaes, tmr sch ends at 12.30. yay!!! then can rest until last rehearsal at abt 3. the whole ceremony will end at 9pm. n the best thing is, sch begins at 9 am on fri. wohooo!!...yes ah...WDL Sec is ssooo lenient. LOL. *u sure anot?* talking bout leniency, lets just put a lil bit bout sch. got a new OM. Mr Khair. Gosh! action nye...baru masok nk marah2. apa je...tak fun ah mcm gini. our DM tak tinggikn suara, dier ni melebih2 pulak..he's a warden officer for one of my fren's bro. *no wonder he's strict* hahaKz...but there's a softer side of him. he'll approach each table during recess. guess he wanna noes how we lead our lives in WDL Sec. (to date, he has yet to appproach ours n me n my frens pray hard that he never will) HAHAHA.

okok. pray hard for me aite. n pray that tmr won't rain too. cos if not, all our efforts will go down the drain. C'mon ppl!!! lets get rolling! yea....

wah piang eh. just got back from another medical treatment. pain sia..the liquid nitrogen spray effect is so damn pain....can't sit still. it stings man. dunno how to go to sch tmr. should i wear shoes or not? if i don't, then i'm gonna be in deep shit for tmr's last speech day parade rehearsal.
gosh. i'm gonna be pretty bz this week. busy with CCA. its gonna be my LAST week of CCA before i totally stand down. argh! i'm sure gonna miss those times we had together. gonna miss the rowdiness, the laughter, the pranks we played on our TOs n CIs. hahaKz.. at the same time, i can now concentrate fully on my studies. yay!! yes ah...freedom at least.no one can touch me now.=D
tomorrow got speech day parade rehearsal. Final Rehearsal. really really hope my GOH contingent can perform really really well to stop all the scoldings n humiliation. really hope so.
wednesday got GOH training only. gotta train these ppl up before the actual day on thursday. i MUST make sure they do it well n correctly. They like got no semangat like that ah, Thats what i don't like abt them. Its not that they cannot do. They can. But its just that they don't want to. I'm getting sick man of reminding them to put in energy n effort in their every step. But yet still, they refuse. Argghh!! irritating ppl. Degil!.
then some more the "ex-CI" (faizal sir) said he want to come. he said earlier on that thurs he can't make it. but upon heraing that i will be the GOH com, he said that's it. i'll ask for leave. wanna kacau me. Mcm btol jek. Padahal esok kene go back camp. haha. padan muka.
then friday will be a memorable day for me. Haizz...God, can't u keep friday away?? Hmm, well i guess that can't happen for sure. Just hope our successors will do something nice, memorable n touching for us. really hope so.
thats it for now. bring u more updates in the days to come. with pics too!! hahaha...


**counting the hours to end my role as the loyal NPCC cadet n GOH commander**

SUPER DUPER AWESOME!!!....

the playful 4B =D
thats US in action!
Cheer Champs!! wohooo!...
Jaliboi, Obi n aWM with OUR class flag.
US again getting ready to dance

Yippee! Wohooo....yay! Hooray!

Yup. Thats all i gotta say for my Sports Day. aHackz! its was fabulous. we started off kinda rocky but hey, we ended off well. Really really well. Cos u noe y?? WE (4B) accomplished our goal! WE defeated those geeks (4A) n managed to get 2nd in the Upper Sec Championship leaving 4A behind us! Wohoo!! U're finally beaten 4A! Yes arh!! HAHA.
WE beat them in terms of cheer. WE were the cheering CHAMPIONS while they were the runner ups. hahaKz..we beat them in almost every track events. it was so damn good to see that "oh man shit. we lost to 4B" look on their face. LOL. n when they lose, they asked US to move aside n make way for them to get back on their seats. what kind of attitude is that man??! eargh. of course WE find it sucky having to tolerate with such absurd behaviour.
mr choh was clearly not happy with our win. initially his class was 2nd n WE were 3rd. but after tabulating the marks -including OUR cheer, we managed to catch up with his class n his 4F went toppling down to 4th placing. LOL. n the most irritating part is, he shouted "U guys wouldn't have won the cheer if not bacause of me giving u an idea to create a storm right??!" what only. how could u say that? lose already lose la. it was ur mistake what. who ask u to tell us?? hahaKz. aniwaes, thanks for ur brilliant suggestion mr 'starfire'. LOL. i can assure u bloggie. when he gets back to sch, he'll tell the whole staff board that 4B won the cheer bcos of him. mark my words man. He'll go around telling ppl that 4B 'stole' his idea. He's one irritating teacher la he. hehe..
UG mixed relay was bad. Not fair sey! Its not the race which is unfair but the way my NPCC unit choose their runners. Stupid sial. We have 2 gd runners. Aini n Su. Y didn’t u make use off them?? The thing which makes me n my mates pissed off is the fact that they didn’t even tell us there was a mixed race. Tup tup tahu2 je they call for UG mixed relay race. Angry sak. Its very selfish of the chairman n the future chairman. Damn selfish!! N u noe what they she said when we consult them abt the race. She said “Nvm lah. So long we never finish last.”. what kind of attitude is that? If u say so long as we finish top 3 or something, then ok lah. Paisey sak when they finished last! Grrr…
Anyway 4A, thanks for being our contender. Our NO.1 contender.I mean it. Thanks a lot. Without u being a threat to us n challenging us, we wouldn’t have worked sooo hard for this championship. This fighting spirit is what brought 4B together n realise our weakness. The feeling of being threatened for 2 months was certainly worthwhile. That’s one valuable experience I can never forget. Thanks a lot 4A. Thank u =)
last words for my class. Well done 4B!! WE made it. All those bickerings n episodes of me hating u for ur attitude n u hating me for asking u to shout for cheer, was certainly worthwhile. Nothing can replace my gratitude for being such a 'last min cooperative' class. One thing u guys like to do is, u will always start being serious only 10 mins before the actual game. why arh?? hmm..thats one thing unique about my dearest 4B =D.
LOVE YA GUYS LOTZZ!!

cheer or jeer??

hmm...it sucks today.i da btol2 lepas tangan ngan my class actually. LOL..dun blame me for that man...i dun fit in in either of both of ur sides. u noe what i did today?? haha..

da terlalu give up, i walk away halfway thru the cheer. haha...gerek. when i go missing, everybody will scream "Nadiah! Nadiah!Where r u? We're gonna start!" haha. i'll always be M.I.A. lor...what to do. they quarrel n disagree on so many things n cannot cme to an agreement. waste so much time.fed up so walk away la. but of course i dun show them i fed up. dun wanna hurt their feelings n make things worst so i keep quiet la. i cannot tahan i go backstage lor..make myself useful in making the class flag. if Nadiah do, confirm nice one. Hehe.. will post a picture of it soon.

so happy zureen scolded mas just now. Sooooo happy! haha. she's so self centred la. want things to work her way n be perfect only.think about others la! u think u're the only one who wanna win izzit? we also. u cannot guarantee that by doing ur way, we will win what...give n take lah. *thats my policy* LOL..n mas was obviously paisey. who won't be paisey if someone talk bad things abt u infront of a class??! haha. serve her right. so action. angkug sangat. hidung tinggi.

dunna whats happening to my class girls. now they're the one having conflict. i'm always the middle person.i dunno y. there's this racist2 thing happening. to me its meant for a joke la. but dunno if some of them take it seriously. frankly speaking, i dun mind if u guys dun like each other as a person but surely not by race right. will concile them whenever there's a need to .i promise.

thats all i guess. shucks!!! i forgot! tmr got speech day parade rehearsal again. Argh..better get ready my unifrom. Here comes ur GOH commander. Weeee....LOL.

~Adios~

escape the 1500m run today. told my peeps facing an injury on my toe. long sia 1500m. 3 n three quarter round u noe. very sian eh...i really am NOT good in running. u can ask me to do all sorts of sports. but please, never ever ask me to be a runner. Pleeaassee!!....

went out to get my DnT stuffs instead. went all the way down to sim lim tower with my dad. hujan lebat dok. taP best arh naik motor hujan2. kene simbar air ngan van. gerek...haha. pusing punya pusing tak jumpa2. nak dekat 2 jam aku rounding itu 3 storey tower. at last give up n call my teacher. rupanya kat basement da...

den went to sim lim square pulak. dad nk cari another optical mouse. sblom g sana, kita try la cari my unc yg da lama menghilang. slalu nye dier kat sungei road. cari punya cari tak dpt so kita jln ah. dah nk jln tu, something tells me to turn. eh, is that him? betol ke its him? looks like. nak panggil takot salah org pulak. just b4 my dad tekan engine, that guy turned n true enuff it was him! ahaCkz...so glad to see him after a few years M.I.A. Had some change of words for abt 20 mins. he was touched to see me. could see it in his eyes. LOL..

sim lim square made me went bonkers. Gosh!! if only i have a pocket full of money..i would have bought the Sony DiViCam, MP4 n of course the latest phones! o my gawd...i reallly wanted those stuffs badly. geram sey tgk bende2 tu...kalau la aku ada duit...tkpela. tunggu laG berapa bulan. insyallah ada. thgen boleh la aku beli...hehe

life is never fair

just got away from another 'lecture' session. aku tetap dgn pendirian ku. its MY blog. i'll feel free to say what i want n put what i want. in case u can't see or u can't read (which i believe is not true), my subheading said: WHATEVER U SEE HERE,STAYS HERE!!. what is it that u don't understand from that?

if u're asking me to take away something from here, its just the same as u asking me to tear myself apart. cos whatever i say here is about myself n its TRUE. in here, Nadiah doesn't lie. its a reality u have to face. u are my one n only one i have, bloggie.

i dun care abt how others feel or think cos i dun think anybody has ever done that for me. apa punya masyarakat ni skrg?? what u see is what u perceive it to be, izzit? merepek ah...no wonder la ex-jailbirds now got no chance. i have experienced it before -not having given a 2nd chance. it really hurts. hate these kind of ppl. buat hidup org susah aje.

i have never seen myself as someone good. really. NEVER. no matter how much u ppl heap parises on me -no doubt i smile back n say thank you- deep in me, i know its not true. nothing beats being praised n encouraged by ur own parents. =( even sis agreed with me on this. all that is needed is a pat on the shoulder n the word "good" or "well done" each time we bring home a medal or even a cert. thats all! it won;t take u an hourto do that.dan bukannya HANYA that piece of paper with grade n numbers on it comes n that will only happen IF we pass (which is like once in a blue moon) haha. tk pernah aku merasai nya. sebalik nya, seyuman sinis yg kami terima. Cis!

the way they say it to me is as if they look down on me. been treated this way since small resulting in myself maybe having a low self-esteem. thats why i wasn't able to fulfill my role as a HC. i was always doubtimg my ownself.

if u're trying to say i'm making myself look bad by doing all this, then i must say : this is me. my pathetic life. Yes. i admit it.

nothing beats being praised n encouraged by ur own parents. =( research has shown that kids tend to believe what their parents say compared to what outsiders say.

my friends are all decent kind of friends. there's only two types of friends i have.
1) leaders (from other schools)
2) peeps affiliated to the SPF/NPCC
thats all. n mind u. all these peeps are high ranking peeps. haha. its not as if i'm trying to boast or cuma kwn dgn org2 yg bernama aja, but its just that i feel easy n safe with these ppl. not saying that my other frens are bad, taP its the outside friends we're talking abt here.

there's more i want to say actually. but i suddenly forgot. dunno y. facing this sicknes called "STML". short term memory loss. LOLx!...


**in case u guys think that nadiah is a good person - or a "role model"- think again. she's just a rotten apple! thats what they say

time for a total change

its been 4 days since i last updated u bloggie. well o well, wed training was....ah, i dunno how to describe la hor. but it was better i should say. just that i wasn't in the right mood. wrong channel la..

talking about channel, some how it reminds me of the politics. good grief the bridge was not carried on. don't know if they're scared or what. scared to lose what? haha...tahu takut kene fitnah. LOL. okok. i guess dat was enuff. dun wanna be dragged to court for giving a tongue-lash.=D

my class girls had their netball interclass on thurs. gosh..the way i see them play was real damn fast. tup tup tahu2 da masok net. haha....*applause*should say they played well. they scored 10-2 in both games. well done well done. keep it up. once again, we must not lose to 4A! argh...these bunch of geeks are always our biggest contender in every way or the other. no matter, u gals will have to go all out to defeat them!

yesterday was good friday. did nothing much. from noon tilll late at night, just lazed at my aunt's 3 storey landed property. nothing much to do. in fact, iwas glued to the tv the whole day. more of a movie marathon. watched one movie after another. haha...quite fun. went out to get dinner with ma aunt n unc. tried out the yusoff satay showed on Our Makan Places: Lost & found. sure enuff, it was nice.

what aunt said in the car on our way to get our food really knocked me out of my sense. perhaps i should do away with my aim to get into poly. need to work xtra hard to go to jc. no point taking the one and only course a poly in s'pore offer cos according to her, in future, they will give priority to the grad of the course i intended to go in to. she said go to NUS n get a degree in that.

so yah. got to change my mindset. its the future we're talking abt here. whatever it is, i have my own ways to pursue that goal. dun ask me how n tell me what to do. i'll just do it my own way. one thing u should know abt me is that "Never question the reason behind my actions". Pantang nenek moyang aku kalau org soal aku tau. Haha..

leave the rest to tmr. wanna watch Nanny McPhee mom jus bought. LOL. C ya..



**only my close friends know what course i'm into. sorry guys if u feel i went back on my words to get into the same poly as u guys. but like i mentioned, its the future we're talking abt. hope u guys will always pray the best for me n so will i. as friends, u shud be happy n glad for me. thanks. =D

blurr..

dunno where to start le. lets see..
can't decide on the blog skin. been searching n searching for one since last weekend. argh! got irritated n finally decided to put this on temporarily. will search for a better one over this weekend. i know its plain w/o links or any pix. will do it later la hor.. *pathetic Lahzz..*
really having a tight schooling schedule. its really hectic for now. dun think there's anytime for me to go out n watch movies or anything of that sort. have to really get working on my artefact. need to go out n get the stuffs hopefully by end of this week. this friday is a holiday so i suppose its a good chance for me to venture out n get my stuffs so hopefully can get it going when the coming sch week begins.
trainings has been bothering me too. HaiZz..this week's fri training has been brought forward to tmr. gosh! its right in the middle of the week. so tiring. next week too! cos next fri is our Sports Day n the week after that is our real Speech Day. gosh! time is flying by damn fast. fuuhh...*tu tanda nya dunia da nk kiamat.*
after consulting a former CI, i decided to forgive my TO over what he did to me last friday. true lahz...partly my fault also bah..BUT that still doesn't change the fact that i still can't accept the way he treated me! = (
class spirit is almost there. most of us participated in the 800m run yest. yeah man! so proud n happy to see yellow ppl running on the track. ahacKz.. lets go 4B lets go!! LOLx..haha

ok lah.thats all for now i guess. luv y'all. bye

i'm lovin' it

ahacKz....rezeki seems to be coming in my way. early last month i received a nomination form from my SC teacher for an Overall All-Rounder Student (OARS) award. so glad. but the application has yet to be approved. if it is, then i'll be receiving about $150. hahaKz..

then yesterday, after all those insult n humiliation, my OC sent me n another 3 of my mates to apply for the SPF-NPCC Badge award.i was like, wow!! thats the most prestigious award any cadet can ever get in NPCC!. hahaha...

also, i got my class t-shirt already!! yay!...so proud of it. its in yellow & green. its like totally Brazilian. haha. so glaring one. no doubt we were the last class to receive our class t-shirt n we were at a disadvantage of wearing it for our X-country, Heats n Cheer competition, we always tell ourselves to convince that the Best is always saved for the LAST! n how true it is...LOLx..plus, my name is printed on it.

n btw, sec 4B made it to the finals! Hooray!! Yippee...n sec 4A, get ready to be wiped off from ur seats. ;)


**4B. B stands for Brazil. so lets get ready to Ginga!

it hurts a lot..

i can't believe my eyes are watery as i type this entry.
Never in my life i've been insulted until that bad. i can't believe he did that to me. i am so disheartened.
i'm a human being. i got feelings. but how could he do that to me?? that was a total no respect for me as a GOH commander. Mark my words. GOH Commander.
he was judging me as a person! cakap je we are not judging u as a person. but by ur actions. whatever criticisms u receive, take it as a feedback for u to improve. Banyak lah tu dgn dier punye judgement!!
my parents don't even say such bad things abt me what more for a total outsider like him to even insult me???!!
whats even worse, it happened infront of a parade with dozens of parents around!! aarrggghh!.. i felt so demoralized. really. never have i been treated like that in my ENTIRE life.
so sad. too devastated to go any further.never felt this small before.
sorry guys. can't say much.





signing out;
"brainless kid"

Reader's Discretion is Advised !..

bastard siak! damn pissed off. Got yacking from mom n dad for keep asking them for money to pay up my school expenses. In total i needed 26 bucks. Class t-shirt costs $20 but i thought i'd be a 'good-daughter' and pay part of it so i asked for $15. Obviously my 'good deed' was overlooked. Heartbroken sey =(. Of course la i didn't tell them that i was also paying part of it cos good deeds are not said out. Moreover, they will think that i am trying to act good n they will NEVER believe what i say. *sigh* =(. The next thing really made my blood boil. In the next sec, sis asked dad for money too. To pay up her class t-shirt TOO. Hers was $13.70 and she asked for a solid $13.70 w/o even paying part of it. Fine, i thought. N u noe what?? dad willingly gave her 50 bucks!! OMG! i was like, wtf??! Felt like shouting but sabar jek. Nvm nadiah. Today's her day, another day would be urs. I mean, that was so UNFAIR!! My class t-shirt is only one in 4 years of my secondary education while hers is EVERY YEAR! n she senang2 jek dpt duit.i'm not blaming my sis la but its just that i really really really hate the way my parents treat me at times. it sucks! big time.

Its bcos of the mistakes i committed in the past which makes them distrust me. i know. C'mon la...all those were childhood mistakes. i was too young to understand n know the consequences. But now that i've grown n mature, i'm trying my best to put that ugly past behind me but here u are reminiscing on the past!!. argghh! pathetic la. i've proven myself enuff to them. Proven to them that i am not a bad kid. Proven it by becoming a student councillor at first and ending up as a Head Councillor. *thats a prestigious post, don't u think so??* Proven to them that i engage in all sorts of sch activities n winning every competition. They themselves know that i am well liked among my peers n teachers. My peeps look up to me. Proven to them that i am not like those kind of kids who lepak2 at the void deck. But what more do they want?? I'm so angry, annoyed n frustrated. Whenever i come home late from sch, they will throw all sorts of accusations on me. Kesian nadiah. Dia ada cuba hari2 balik siang pasal tknk kasi mak bapak dier marah. Dulu tme jaD councillor, banyak meeting dia skip. Spai ada sekali tu FHM kata "Apa punya Head Councillor ni?? Bila ada meeting mesti cabut. Kalau tak cabut pon, mesti attend halfway." In a way he's trying to say i'm useless n helpless la. But what can i do? Nvm bout what they say bout me. Let me bear it all alone. Anak mana yg tknk ambil hati mak bapak?

But each time when i reach home: Y everday come home late? U sure u go to sch or u go elsewhere? Y izzit dat its always u doing this n that n not others? Y must it be u? thats what i get after a tired day at sch. have they ever spared a thought for me? i don't know. imagine urself to be going to work n as soon as u reach home, u kena nag for this n that. don't u find it irritating n frustrating?? sick n tired of it. Too sick n tired until i can no longer be bothered with what they say n defend myself in order to prove that what they say is actually wrong. Eventually, when i keep quiet, they will think that what they say is true. Whatever LAH! Have it ur way then. No point proving them wrong when they know that every word that comes out from my mouth is a total lie. Nvm, only time will tell.

Dah la hp kene confiscate for 3 months pasal bill telefon melambung. Ahah...*bulb lights up*. That leads me to another point. Of course la i was totally not happy about it. I was like, 3 months?? *faints* That time sis nye bill pon melambung taP tkde la kene spai confiscate2 smua ni. all she did as her punishment was to place her hp on top of the tv each time she reaches home from sch. thats it. Da la kene confiscate. Privacy got intruded pulak tu. How can u read up my msgs??!!! argh. dun wanna go any deeper.

aniwaes, i got this feeling that sis nye bill akan melambung this month. Thats because i've been observing her sms-ing every now n then. One min after another, that sms ringtone will sound. I suspect she has a bf. Kakaka! Thats bcoz her MSN nick says "~+NuTty+~ i luRb u bEri bEri mUch..!!". HahakZ. Whats that suppose to mean huh? N whats more, her sms-ing activity is out of the ordinary. Keterlaluan. She will bring her hp to bed n still sms. Dun tell me u sms ur normal fren so frequently until u have to bring ur hp to bed?? Hahaha...surely not right. Funny la. Dunno la ha..pdai2 la jwb bila bill telefon dtg ye. Tk melambung, nasib arh. =P

wheelie wheel

its cold in here. been raining these few days *shivers* today was rather an interesting day to me. quite a number of events cropped up.

my form eacher didn't come today so for the 20 mins of our morning LAP programme we were more to relaxing instead of getting our WORD POWER done. then came in our LD to check on us. 4B just seems can't be trusted to behave ourselves. i'm so mad at my class boys. they're VERY mischievious. i dun see a reason why they have to be a clown in class. they think its cool n funny but i find it really annoying n irritating! they were whistling like a flock of birds n when the LD ask them to own up, no one did. she kept asking who was it n my boys being cowards didn't want to own up until eventually she threatened to bar us from this afternoon's cheering prelim round. we went like "Ooii...own up lah!" n fiq being the so-called 'hero' owned up when in actual fact he didn't. i know cos he sat right beside me.i told him dun be stupid but he refuses to listen. LD didn't believe him cos the look on his face tells that he's lying n he was trembling when owning up. LD knowing that i was a head councillor, turned to me and asked " Head Councillor, is that true?" i hate it when teachers put me in a spot. arggghh!.. i didn't want to tembak that bloody fella but i have to. i was forced. i just said it was from someone at the back. didn't say specifically who.everybody knew who it was but its just that we want him to own up. everybody went whispering " its 'K' right.." everyone know its him cos he was our regular whistler n he was always the one coming up with pranks-other than his companion,MIR. his looks on his face shows that he's guilty. eventually he didn't own up n fiq was left alone to go see the LD after sch n get detention. stupid act. after LD step out of class i said to K " y didn't u own up??" he shouted back at me "what me?? semua aku ah ni!.." c'mon la K.. so damn angry when he shouted at me across the class. aku ckp baik2 kau kene pekik balik pe??! da dier merajok satu hari buat muka bonyok. apa saja entah. kalau tak buat dah la. lupakn jek. yg kau nk melebih2 terbawa2 buat apa. there goes another frined of mine. i was never on good terms with him until this year when we saw a positive change in him. i guess i ruined it all when i thought things were gonna change =(. 'K' i'm sorry if i made a wrong accusation bout u just now. we've been friends since pri sch n i dun wanna end it on a bad note.

first thing in the morning, our SS teacher didn't come. dunno why. as usual my class was ecstatic whenever a teacher is absent. HaizzZ..these kids apparently dun see the seriousness in their O's. Specifically the boys. there was no relief teacher so we were free to do our stuffs. opened up my maths txtbk n dd the excercises in it. suddenly there was total silence. fuuny, i thought. looked aroung an saw the P making her rounds. no wonder. since i was nearest t the door, she asked me what lesson we were supposed to be having n i answered SS. she gave me the look of "its SS n u're doing Maths??" haha. she walked in had a chat with the class. normal psycho thingy. emphasizing more on our O's.

Malay lesson today was one of a kind. more of a memorable one for me. Cg was in a good mood today. Gave us karangan topic and asked us to hand in next Tue. Wow...Cg shared his life story with us. more on his family background. so touching. at one point, his voice went soft and as if his voice was stuck at the throat. it was a sad story. he went emotional la. could see his eyes watering. to round it all up, there's always a good thing behind everything bad.

cheering was nerve- wrecking. even befoer we could even step into the hall, some of my mates were already crying. afraid that we'd make a fool our to ourselves. afraid that we would cock up. normal la. i was nervous too. all tensed up. afrid that we'll lose. rumours all around said that the sec 5s will be putting up a performance. we really really really wanna win this comp. had fun shouting in the hall calling for other classes to go up n perform. in the end, we performed last. LOL. well, rumours are not true n it proved to be right when sec 5s didn't put up a good show. more to "making a fool out of themselves' kind of thing. haha. they had fun though. can see it. we felt threatened by 4As n 4Fs performance. they did well. can't deny hat 4A was totally awesome! a real cheerleading team. solid man! overall, i can say 4B did a great job man. well done guys. **got this feeling that 4A,4B n 4F will make it thru to the finals** ahaKz..lets await the results tmr. if the word4B comes out, i'll be the 1st person to shoot out from my seat. hahahaha.

actually there's lot more to say but can't stay long. need to go. mum's nagging liao. niwaes, this entry is quite lengthy hor. haha. more stories tmr, adios....=D

Go 4B go!!

just got back from another day of hardcore cheer practice. the prelim round is like less than 21 hours away. Gosh!! i'm like so excited but at the same time tired n nervous too. dunno wads going on with ma class. playful as usual. difficult to get them together la. but nevertheless, we managed to pull through n get everything done. yes arh! haha.we wanna win it! dun wanna let that bloodt sec 4A to yake over us. currently we are on TIE with them. argh! competition's getting tougher.

well, conflict arised amidst the preparation. fana got annoyed n irritated by some of me peeps pesterings. they keep on bugging her to join in when she already felt left out. haiZz...pity la.

last night while chatting at MSN, kimi nudged me and said he already broke up. i went like "What??! Why?"..he sounded kinda happy but i know he feels hurt deep down inside. but its just that he doesn't want to show it. guys are EGO. right?? haha. i know them. they were both a gd couple. they've been my mates since Sec 1. he asked me to comfort him. Me?? my gawd. i'm not rreally good in comforting ppl but since i was the only one he had ONLINE, i just played my part as a friend lor. managed to make him feel a lil' better. hahakZ..apparently he doesn't know what he wants either. silly guy. haha i guess he managed to patch things up wth her. haha. long story la. dun wanna tell. leave it all to Fate.

HaiZz...i have to get my hands on for my DnT artefact. argh!! NA students are already finishing their artefact n we being the EXP students are so damn slow! i dunno whose fault izzit. Students or teacher? partly teacher cos he didn't push us n bug us. haha. i'm doing taking DnT for my O's but here is my dad getting worried n excited over it. he's been offering me to go to Sim Lim to get my stuffs but i keep rejecting it. its not that i don't accept his offer -in fact, i like that.it makes live easier for me. haha- but i need to get approval from my teacher first. see if he agrees on my artefact n any improvement. i know my dad better. he'll only offer once. once u reject, thats it. its gone. but i know he won't do that this time round la.haha. OKOK. i MUST GET MY ARTEFACT GOING!!

k lah. need to get my arse going before mum shouts at me again for not bathing yet. haha. support 4B ya. pray for us. thanks =D Peace Out

feeling appreciated.

life is getting irritated. irritated with ppl. just hate when ppl intrude my privacy. haiya, dun wanna talk abt la. just makes me hate it more. vengeance growing within.

aniwaes, had cheer practice today. the dance steps are like...OMG! its so damn fast but yet cool. i like it but it seems like i can't master it. haha, of course. how do u expect someone as stiff as me to dance hip hop? funny la. i can even laugh at my own dance. LOL. its fun to get urself involved in all this "in-thing" once in awhile la. haha.

sad things happened today. one of my close frens got upset over the cheer. the overall i/c forgot to put her name in the team and she felt offended. Fana, if u're reading this, dun brood over it la. Rachael has lots of things to do. Perhaps it just slipped out of her mind. U noe her rite...she's taking charge of eveything. From t-shirt to choreography n stuffs. Forgive her la. it takes a real person to forgive someone.

here's the highlight of the day. the sec 1s will be getting their uniform. tried their unifrom out today. they were so damn eager that they made a hell of a noise n got themselves punished by my CI. pity damn la. Haha. but what to do. shots are called by her not me. it was a total chaos in that room. i couldn't take it man. lucky me i didn't get admitted into the IMH. everywhere was like "Nadiah this one can? Nadiah this one ok?" i can't be left alone with a peace state of mind. Imagine, settling 42 kids clothings in an hour. i was like their mom lor...Gosh! that was a total nightmare. it seems like they like me lots. even though there were 5 other NCOs there, they choose to come to me. haha. the fact that they look up to me makes me feel so grateful n appreciated. not only that, never in my life did a grp of ppl pose positive comments on my looks. well, these peeps did. thanks a lot guys. =D haha

ok la. writing off to get my hmk done. lets get some ink going. haha. alrite, buaiZz..

Pain, fun, anger, satisfaction...

A breath of relief at last. Another week of sch has ended and tomorrow will be beginning of a new one. Didn't update my blog for the past few days cos apparently i was too tired and have got no time for it. hahaKz...

Remember i said that my GOH contingent was sucky? and that our commandant is..."so-so"? Well, i guess i will have to take back what i said cos i must admit there has been improvements. Drastics actions were taken by my CIs n mind u, it wasn't pleasing to some of us. Those who have been coming down for trainings but not performing well were being taken out by from the contingent. Pity them lahZ..but what to do. If we don't change these ppl who are not performng well n they are just there for the sake of being in the prestigious contingent, we are gonna trashed by Mr Teo for not being oblivious to these matters. N he has been condemning us! Argh..Parade commander n GOH commander has been changed. That made a BIG improvement.

I'm so glad God heard my silent prayer. Although it was kinda shocking at first for my CI V Tan to appoint me as the GOH commander, i was determined to turn things over. I'm sooo happy! Hahaha...i didn't know why she changed both the PC n the GOH com n i don't even wanna noe y. But pity Huda la. I know she's been dying to become the GOH com but she has to understand that our pride is currently at stake now n it defeats the purpose of becoming a commander if her command can't be heard. Yesterday Mr Teo invited an SAF Navy officer to train us. Gawd!! i don't know what in the world he's upto but nvm, we learnt a lot from him. Razali almost got discharged from the 2 Parade ic but he defended himself n managed to be given a 2nd chance.

Angry that my contingent still can't get what it means n what it takes to be a Guard of Honour. They're still fooling around. I don't want to punish them cos i dun believe in doing so n that they will end up showing attitude n nothing is achieved but hatred. i psycho them time n again n i can see them understanding me n things have changed quite a bit. Still, we have a looong way to go. Yet to improve to Mr Teo that we're worth becoming the GOH. HahaKz..

Aniwaes, dad bought me a new USB drive. Cruzer Micro with skins. Kinda cool. Can change the skin color as n when i like. There's white,bue n pink. Cool huh...haha. Don't noe why the sudden move to get me IT stuffs when i myself is an IT idiot. Haha..but neverheless, thanks a lot daddy. Haha :D. I'm not really into IT but more into photography. Been aiming for a DiviCam. HahaKz...wonder if any kind soul out there would get me one for my birthday. That would be the best gift ever! haha...yea rite. Dream on Nadiah. LOL.

Alright. Back to sch stuffs. Need to get my hmk done by this afternoon. So peeps, stay cool and rock on. Outss...